Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
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