I'm going to jail i love you
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize