i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
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