I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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