i love accidental penises.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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