Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize