how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
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I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
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He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
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