you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
We're like a lot better than the average bears
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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