we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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