Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need moral support for this bender
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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