have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
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You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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