i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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