your parents love me but you hate me
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
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