A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Randomize