Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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