i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
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throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
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Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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