Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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