it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
You were trust falling into bushes
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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