you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize