The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
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