$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
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