he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize