Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize