I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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