im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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