My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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