I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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