she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
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I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
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You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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