How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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