break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
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