I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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