no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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