Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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