This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize