I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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