I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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