i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
you win again, gameday.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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