I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
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i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
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When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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