He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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