I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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