just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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