I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
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I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
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