Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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