Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
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