Texts From Last Night

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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.

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  (919): please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car. http://tfl.nu/gqa0
  Replies (8) Good night (455) Bad night (1789) Order T-Shirt
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.

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  (636): 12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome. http://tfl.nu/wffb
  Replies (10) Good night (2568) Bad night (746) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.

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  (717): So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC. http://tfl.nu/vvcv
  Replies (89) Good night (2923) Bad night (426) Order T-Shirt
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  (209): View more from California

  she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook

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  (209): she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook http://tfl.nu/tp82
  Replies (24) Good night (1821) Bad night (10047) Order T-Shirt
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came

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  (517): The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came http://tfl.nu/4ft9
  Replies (16) Good night (6983) Bad night (823) Order T-Shirt
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.

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  (604): He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route. http://tfl.nu/lmqa
  Replies (4) Good night (640) Bad night (4103) Order T-Shirt
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair

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  (908): i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair http://tfl.nu/bwcm
  Replies (21) Good night (7094) Bad night (1036)
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  (606): View more from Kentucky

  I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.

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  (606): I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships. http://tfl.nu/4vx4
  Replies (10) Good night (1075) Bad night (1112) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.

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  (914): They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies. http://tfl.nu/g6fw
  Replies (3) Good night (820) Bad night (346) Order T-Shirt
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.

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  (603): I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment. http://tfl.nu/fbcm
  Replies (1) Good night (762) Bad night (339) Order T-Shirt
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  (805): View more from California

  There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it

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  (805): There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it http://tfl.nu/82im
  Replies (6) Good night (1052) Bad night (410) Order T-Shirt
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina

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  (217): I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina http://tfl.nu/lruw
  Replies (8) Good night (1259) Bad night (499) Order T-Shirt
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  (386): View more from Florida

  The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.

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  (386): The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband. http://tfl.nu/86hq
  Replies (4) Good night (613) Bad night (557) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.

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  (919): Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork. http://tfl.nu/g3ta
  Replies (6) Good night (749) Bad night (430) Order T-Shirt
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  (226): View more from Ontario

  No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time

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  (226): No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time http://tfl.nu/rgly
  Replies (2) Good night (409) Bad night (212) Order T-Shirt

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