This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it penis luge time yet?
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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