If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize