All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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