Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
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