But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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